Sometimes it’s better to just sleep, sleep through everything…Beth paused, considering Ryan as he slept. Sleeping on a couch like that, you discover bones you never knew you had, and they all hurt. Her mind began to wander off into silly philosophical mazes about discovery and things you didn’t know you had and whether pain was real or imaginary. Procrastination is a powerful force, she thought dryly, even when you recognize it and try to nail it to wall. Take that, procrastination. Consider yourself nailed.
Leaving the house for the privacy of the deck, Beth leaned over the rail, Ryan’s cell phone firmly gripped in her hand – she wasn’t taking any chances with it – and tried to prepare herself for the call. Cooper was going to be furious that she’d taken off like this; she knew him. It would have scared him, fear fueling the anger; she already felt regret -- Coop had been through too much, no matter how justified she was, running off and frightening him had been childish. Listen to him; and wait…just wait.
The phone rang and rang, long purring notes in the silence. Beth kept waiting for it to click over into voice mail; he must have switched it off, something he only did when he was waiting for a call he didn’t want to miss. She was about to hang up when finally Cooper answered, abrupt and hard. “Ryan where is she – “ Well it was Ryan’s cell she was using since hers was at the bottom of the pool. “It’s me Coop.”
“Yes I’m all right – we’re both all right,” she replied to his immediate question. “I know I know – “ Beth paced the length of the deck, early morning light glinting on thick frost on the top of the rail. She was cold, shaking with cold. Clutching Ryan’s cell close to her ear, and it seemed to smell faintly of his skin, she tried to listen through the shivering to Cooper’s voice.
“It’s too early for you,” she began, trying to cut the conversation short since it wasn’t really a conversation at all. There was no point standing out here in the cold listening to him yell that she needed a 24 hour babysitter, and she felt numb, not inclined to argue about it. Or to point out that considering the last few days, he could have used one himself.
Unsuccessfully. Cooper’s voice was rough, ragged, but he insisted on keeping her on the phone. He hadn’t slept; she needed to calm down; he would explain; he was flying in this afternoon; where the hell was she and damn it do not ever do that to him again. Anger, weariness, anxiety…but he hung up with one short strong declaration: “I’m not going to allow anything to destroy my family – I mean that, Beth.”
Through the window she saw Ryan start to stir, moving stiffly on that uncomfortable couch where he had spent the night, although she doubted he got much sleep either. She’d fallen asleep right there on that same couch, dozed off against his shoulder while he lay half sprawled and gazing silently out at the lake. Looking at him now, Beth wondered uneasily if Ryan fell into the “anything” category Cooper was referring to.
She slid back the door and went into the house, heading for the kitchen to make coffee, brooding on it. Rafe almost certainly was “anything”, but that man was unstoppable; the more Coop pushed him, the harder he would push back. Ryan however…Ryan was really worried about his job.
Hearing his footsteps behind her, Beth turned and offered, “I made some coffee. Do you want some?” Ryan stretched, massaged the back of his neck, studied her groggily. “You did something to your hair…it’s nice.”
She smiled and sat down. “I almost whacked it off with a pair of scissors.”
Ryan gulped coffee, shook his head. “Don’t do that.” Then, slightly embarrassed, he added, “It’s your hair, sorry, you can do whatever you want with it.”
“Except cut it off,” Beth teased him gently. “Yeah, well,” he started, glanced out the window then back at her with a small smile, “it looks good long.”
The moment stretched out, sunlight starting to warm the room. It felt good to be here, quiet, peaceful, time suspended and golden, the companionship close and easy. Still not quite fully awake, Ryan returned her smile, briefly allowed himself to imagine what it would be like to stay here with her with no limits, temporal or physical, a fantasy both intensely sweet and erotic…
He swallowed hard, shook it off and glanced at his cell where she’d left it on the counter. Get real here, he told himself. You’ve got a lot to deal with. “You called him? How did it go?”
Beth stood up, put her coffee cup on the sink, and with her back still to him, briefly considered what she wanted to tell him. Right now, as little as possible seemed best. “I need to get Rainie up and start back,” she said, still not looking in Ryan’s direction. “He’s flying in this afternoon, stopping off to see Wyatt first.”
Damage control, Ryan thought sourly. “All right,” he pushed back from the table, his back aching from the night on that couch, “I’ll jump in the shower and drive you home.”
Disturbed, still unable to stop thinking of him as one of the “anythings” that weren’t going to be allowed, Beth put her hand on his bicep, and, abandoning her decision to say nothing, told him firmly, “I’m not going to let you lose your job, Ryan. I won’t let that happen. Don’t worry about it.”
It stunned him. He stared at her, surprised, touched, and then amused. When was the last time someone had tried to take care of him instead of the other way around? Had that ever happened? “Beth,” Ryan gently responded, “thank you, but don’t get in the middle of this. I can take care of myself. Now go get your little girl ready to go.”
South Beach – Stanfield Residence – Sunday night
Beth heard the limo pull up, the door slam, then drive away before she saw it. It was hours later than she had expected him. Rayne was finally asleep, and that in itself had been a challenge since she had fought to be allowed to stay up until her father arrived. Cooper looked weary, upset, the shadows under his eyes dark, his mouth tight.
He took two paces toward her and stopped, and smiled. That same half smile, lighting up his eyes, the same smile she remembered from the very first time she’d met him. Warm. Seductive. “Damn,” he said, rough voice quiet, “you look so good.”
Cooper certainly did too. It had been a month since she had seen him; not a significant amount of time but long enough to blur the edges of memory. Even exhausted, he was strikingly sensual. Remember why you left yesterday, she cautioned herself. Don’t let him immediately seduce you into giving him his way, into always agreeing to whatever he wants. Not that it wiped the smile off her face, because it didn’t.
Nevertheless, it was difficult to stand there next to him and hold onto her anger. In a softer tone than she had planned on using to greet him, she allowed him to take her hand, brush her cheek with his mouth, replying, “So do you Coop. But we need to talk.”
“I know. That’s why I’m here. I don’t want anything coming between us – I need to straighten things out.”
Ryan moved out from behind her where he’d been standing silently, his gaze fixed on some imaginary point beyond them. “I’ll be taking off then,” he cut in.
“Ryan,” Cooper intercepted him before he left, “I want a word before you go. Outside.”
Ryan waited by his SUV, already anticipating the worst and trying to come up with his next move. Damn it, any other time and he’d have enough resources to tide him over until he came up with something else, but not this time, not with Landry depending on him for support. He drew a deep breath and faced Cooper.
Cooper approached him, crossed his arms, shifted his weight, his temper barely in check, but he was too tired and too anxious to get back inside to Beth to deal with this now. “When the tour is over,” he told Ryan flatly, “I want to discuss your contract. In my office.”
His expression still, impassive, masking his concern, Ryan looked directly at him. “Is there a problem?”
“Not one I can’t deal with,” Cooper abruptly flared. “My wife is a beautiful woman. Is that why you delayed letting me know where she was? Do you have a problem handling that?”
Remembering Beth’s pain and confusion last night at the lake house, Ryan’s eyes narrowed. “I’ll see you in your office,” he said, half turned to go, then answered the question before he got in his car, knowing he was going too far. “She’s a beautiful person. She deserves the best.”
Incensed, Cooper inhaled hard; son of a bitch…the implication being that he wasn’t? Had he even been asking the right question? Instead of wondering whether something was going on between the two of them, maybe he should be questioning how far it had gone.
He slammed back into the house, didn’t see her, and called out, “Beth! Where are you?” “Upstairs.”
Waiting for him on the deck outside the bedroom, Beth watched him stride toward her, and immediately saw the difference. Cooper had been tired and on edge when he arrived; now anger lit his eyes. He walked up very close to her, and his hoarse voice deceptively silky, “You’re going to tell me the truth about what’s going on with Ryan. I want to hear it, right now, all of it.”
Beth had been prepared to start in on him about the club, the rumors, and was momentarily stunned into silence. So they were right back where they were two days ago…and in a place that left her deeply uneasy. For all her 'we're just friends' rationalizations, there had been more than that between the two of them, a lot more than that. But that didn't justify Cooper's behavior. The attack on Ryan was a diversion.
Rage pulsed through her; she felt the movement in her womb, as if the anger poured into it like acid. “What is this?!” she shot back at him. “I’m not allowed to have a friend?! Or maybe I need to get your permission first?!”
Cooper made an effort, an enormous effort, to pull back. He paced to the end of the deck, breathed in the night air, turned and said in a calmer tone, “Either you’re lying or you’re blind. You’re going to stand here and tell me you don’t know how he feels about you? And that nothing, nothing at all has happened between the two of you?”
This was the moment, she thought, dismayed, trapped, suddenly frightened, this was the moment she should tell him. But it would come back on Ryan, come back hard. Like the episode with Chris, it was one thing to take the responsibility on herself, but quite another to harm someone else. One part of her mind screamed are you crazy? It was one time! Tell him and get it over with! Let Ryan take care of himself! While another staggered, in denial, no that wasn’t true, Ryan didn’t feel anything, Ryan was just a friend. An attractive friend – there was attraction. Huge undeniable attraction. That was different. That wasn’t the same thing.
She walked away from him, sat down heavily on the bench, trying to breathe. Cooper followed, standing over her and looking down in silence. “Coop,” Beth began carefully, attempting to find some truth in this mess, picking through her words like walking a mine field, “I have no relationship with Ryan except friendship. I am not sleeping with him," she added, using the present tense. That was true. It hadn't happened again. "And if he feels something more than that, I’m honestly not aware of it.”
He shook his head, exasperated, held out his hand and helped her back up, still studying her face. Something was wrong. She was protecting Ryan, but protecting him as a lover? Cooper didn't see it, didn't feel it, and had trouble believing she'd chose a damned bodyguard over him. Pushing it further, he told her, “Then you won’t have a problem if I fire him. Right?”
That sent shock waves through her. “Fire him?” Beth echoed. “Coop, don’t fire him. That’s not fair!”
“I don’t give a damn about fair!” Cooper shouted, irritated, frustrated and fighting waves of exhaustion. Between Wyatt and Ryan…he knew he never should have hired Ryan to begin with…“I don’t want him around you! It’s my decision!”
“Your decision,” her anger creeping back again. “Just like it was your decision to go play at a brothel without telling me? That was just fine. No problem unless I found out about it, then it was Rafe’s fault. Doesn’t matter that I might feel horrible about it, who cares about that, it’s your life, it’s your decision! Are you so arrogant you can’t see that?!”
For a long moment they stood in silence, the wind picking up, blowing hard from offshore. The ground beneath him seemed to shift, showing cracks he hadn’t known were there, ominous, yawning, a landscape of pain and suspicion. Deeply alarmed, he had to stop this and stop it now, it had gone too far. “Beth,” Cooper finally started, feeling his way through, carefully, watching her, “Chameleon…it’s a safe place for me; it’s private; I don’t go there for sex.” Not now – but that was history and detail she didn’t need to know. “They know not to touch me. I didn’t handle it the way I should have – that’s obvious. You know what it’s like on tour; it never bothered you before. Why is it an issue now? And Ryan…baby something's not right. I don’t understand what’s gone wrong.”
Beth’s face suddenly drained of color, her mouth white. She looked past him toward the bedroom door, reached out; put her hand on his arm. “Coop…behind you…”
Confused, now worried she was going to faint, he’d pushed this too hard, he hesitated. “What…I don’t –"
“Rainie…" Beth whispered. Cooper spun around and saw his daughter standing in his bedroom, her face contorted, angry, frightened, little hands clenched into fists. Damn it, how long had she been standing there?
Before either of them could move, Rayne whirled and took off running, storming through the bedroom door, her footsteps echoing as she tore down the stairs.
“My god Coop – what did she hear?” Beth gasped.
At the last moment, he took a chance he could catch up with Rayne and pulled Beth hard up against him. “I love you,” Cooper swore quietly, “and I’ll get her. I’ll take care of it.”
“Rainie!” he shouted as he took the stairs two at a time. “Hey Rainie wait a minute!”
There was no answer. Wind blew, rattling the glass of the front door which was wide open, the courtyard and the street beyond it wide and open and empty.
----------------------
NEXT CHAPTER: South Beach Chapter 40
18 comments:
Blogger has eaten my comment twice...hopefully this one sticks. Absolutely loved this...the emotion just pours out of it, so real and true. Coop's anger and suspicion and Beth's denial as well as anger and confusion were perfectly told.
Beth and Ryan have such an interesting connection and his feelings have truly gone beyond the safety net for him. He is falling hard and fast and I hope there will be something there to cushion the landing because I doubt anything is going to come between Coop and Beth.
Cooper's arrogance is one thing I do think he loses sight of at times. But the key is his family, something he covets more than anything and you have shown both sides of that here wonderfully.
And Rainie...where on earth did she go? Not too far I hope...
Stunning shots, so well setup. You took such care and it always, always shows.
I loved it, just loved it!
thank you Gayl, not the least for keeping me from putting a hole in the wall with my head. You know how long I struggled to find my way with this. thank you always.
Oh man!! This was crazy good! First, poor Raine! It sucks to hear your parents arguing especially at such a young age. You don't know what's going on...
Secondly Ryan just needs to get it together! Obviously Beth doesn't love him(at least not THAT way) and he has someone who wants to love him. But I guess you can't decide who you love although wasn't there an old song...if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with...
Anyways, I love the tension! Why would Cooper think any woman would be okay with her man hanging out at a brothel?!! Hello, seriously? But Beth needs to realize no man wants his wife in a potential situation with a bodyguard either! Oh man...the drama! LOVE it!
Cheryl, thank you! That's exactly where I was trying to go.
I don't think it's possible to force an emotional attachment you don't feel, no matter how much someone else loves you. Ryan can't make himself love Landry, and shouldn't try, not in my opinion.
Thank you!
OMG!!! Raine, where did she go?
Oh god, I hate fights, poor Raine I wonder what she heard...she must be feeling horrible, I really hope Ryan was still out and caught her somehow!!!
Cooper and Beth, they have so much to talk, too much to say, but hopefully next time they will make sure the doors are close!!
I don't really want Coop to fire Ryan, but oh well, something needs to be done... the flame is there and I doubt it will extinguish any time soon.. Beth and Ryan do need so time away from each other... I hate to admit it but that's the only solution I see for this "flame" to end....
the attraction is there and will always be there and will continue to grow as long as they are together... he is an incredible man and he is always by her side, she might fall in love... and that would be a mess, not only for her and her family but fur Ryan and girlfriend as well.... what a situation!!!
I loved LOVED the answer Ryan gave to Cooper, lol "she deserves the best" lol
that put Cooper back into place and gave him a lot to think about!!!
Wonderful update Beth!!! I don't see anything "minor" about this chapter, I think every chapter till now has been a key for the whole story to progress, so Bravo!!! you have done a wonderful job!!
Really nice pictures, love them all and I Beth looks lovely with her new hair do!!
Again you did wonderful!!
Sandy thank you.
Ryan will figure out something, even if he does get fired. Not that I would blame Cooper for doing it. Ryan has a pretty determined woman in his corner though.
Rainie...not saying much on what happens to her. I can pretty much guarantee that Ryan didn't hang around to find her.
Thank you -- I hope the chapters do build on each other. I know I've left a few things hanging; I intend to pick them up eventually.
Uh oh. This is seriously not a good development. Where did little Ranie go? How could she disappear so quickly? I hope she hasn't gone too far, and that they find her quickly... safe and sound. Poor little thing. It must have been very upsetting to hear her mommy and daddy fighting.
That was quite a scene between Cooper and Beth. They really let it all hang out, except for the little deception on Beth's part. I understand her reasons though... she clearly feels responsible for Ryan's involvement, and she's probably comfortable with having him around... definitely some emotional entanglement there (You know, this situation kind of reminds me of Camelot... the love triangle between Richard, Guenevere and Lancelot! See what happens when you trust your best right-hand man with your lonely beautiful wife?!!)
Something does need to be done. The attraction between those two is not simply going to go away. Beth has to realize that. Some distance or time apart is certainly needed. Coop clearly loves her and is willing to do anything to keep his little family together. A man like that is worth fighting for and staying with. :D
Word of advice, though, Coop. Seriously. Stay away from those private clubs that house seductive-acting half naked women... it's really not a good place for married men to hang out!
BTW, I loved those close up shots of Beth. She looked absolutely beautiful! I adore those green-eyed looks of hers!
And hey! I'm all caught up, aren't I? Bugger that. I hope you write more soon! :D
Tammy...thank you so much!
You completely floored me with that Camelot analogy. How absolutely fascinating. I can't believe I missed that. I mean I CANNOT believe I missed that. I have the flag of Cymru (Cymru am byth) on the wall next to my desk. And I missed that?
Thank you. More to come soon, definitely. Again, thank you!
I had a suspicion their argument might have woken up Rayne. Now, they have a missing daughter.
I feel sorry for Cooper, his first wife is killed after dealing with an obsessed fan, and he has no idea whether to believe his second wife is not having an affair with Ryan or not.
I think Beth should have been truthful. If she had, he might have forgiven her anyway because she was honest. And Cooper should have fully explained about Chameleon. All these secrets between them has backfired in their faces.
Somehow, I don't see a happy ending for these two. I hope I'm wrong of course, but as it stands, they will either stay with each other for Rayne's sake but always suspect each other of being disloyal to their marriage or they both come completely clean to each other and start to mend the cracks in their marriage and save their daughter from possibly growing up to hate them both or develop her own intimacy issues.
A great chapter as always. This series is definately among the stories that always make me feel like I should try my hand at some contemporay fiction.
Bravo Beth. And no matter how busy I am, this is one of the stories on my "always read" list.
And you know what they say, if you can get the reader to care about what happens to the characters, that's half your job done already as a writer.
Okay, wiping the tears from my eyes...literally! That argument was so real, I could feel both their pain and anger, hurt, everything. And then to have Rayne behind them, I almost thought she saw somebody with a gun behind him or something-had no idea what to expect there! For her to run away like that rips at my heart, if they felt bad before, I can't imagine how it would feel if they can't find her for a while. They will find her won't they?! :D
And is it just me or does Cooper just light up the room? That first shot of him just made me smile, as soon as he enters a scene it just sizzles.
And if Ryan wants to keep his job, he shouldn't annoy the boss man so much! LOL. Love that you said he knew he went too far when he said that about Beth deserving the best.
I really loved this update and will be gnawing on my fingernails until the next one!
This was great, Beth! I don't understand why you think you didn't capture the emotion--you totally did. With the shots all together, it's even more emotional. No action? There's plenty of action! There isn't a dull moment, everything is riddled with tension. Now Rayne is gone and it's no longer an adult issue, it's an issue with everyone. Her picturesque view of her parents is forever shattered and goodness knows where her mind has taken the things she's heard...
As I said, it was an excellent way to divert the problem. To force it into a different, perhaps resolvable angle. It isn't just about Beth or Ryan or Cooper--it's about Rayne now and that changes -everything-.
Excellent stuff, Beth!
Chari, I think that marriage is going to survive. They need and love each other. However, both of them need to consider how their behavior affects the other.
That's an enormous compliment! Thank you so much!
LOL! Yes Emily, Cooper does light up the room! And of course he knows it and uses it! Very very good guy though.
I am sort of planning as I go along, but I'm sure they will find Rayne.
Thank you!
Mao, thank you so much. I really appreciate your support, and I guess it did work with Rayne running away. It enabled me to leave things sort of unresolved plus bring her into the tangled web of relationships, which I think is realistic.
I find it hard to come up with interesting and different shots and angles when the action consists of people talking or arguing with each other. I tried to break it up a little bit and hope that helped.
Again, thank you!
Raw emotion once again, Cooper and Beth, nicely played. Having a child overhear such a 'discussion' is not always a good thing, nor the fact she seemingly has disappeared into thin air. But I have a feeling Cooper will find her and set things right.
"an attractive friend" yeah. Well, I think Beth is deluding herself, why else would she keep that little nugget from Cooper, 'protect his job', I think deep down she wants to keep Ryan around, not that I blame her.
Great update.
Karen, thank you. A lot of denial going on here, that's for sure. There is certainly an emotional attachment between Ryan and Beth that goes both ways, although I don't think the emotion is the same. She's comfortable with him and definitely attracted to him; she's not in love with him though, which makes any effort to keep him around a little selfish.
Fantastic work with this argument, it shifted and moved like a real one would have, both of them trying to make each other see things from their respective sides with just enough sting to make a point. And as awful as an argument is, they can still be cathartic, and Beth and Cooper seem like they would now be able to talk things out. Rayne storming out would have been a good reminder what it is they stand to loose, fingers crossed she didn't get far.
goodbye_sun, the argument was easier to write than I'd like to admit. Points on both sides.
Their child's reaction to the argument might bring the focus back hard and fast.
thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment. It is always such a pleasure, and an honor.
Post a Comment